Season 22

Series Negative Fourskin
Bitches love Colin.
Bitches love Colin.
About Time
Began 5 January 1985
Ended 30 March 1985
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Season 21 The Lost Season / Season 23

Season 22 marked the first of the only two seasons of Doctor Who's Golden Age.

It was the first full season of our handsome pie overlord Not Tom Baker, with Nicola Whineant continuing her run as Peri.

The episode format changed from 25 to 45 minutes, which pissed off a lot of people for some reason.

Speaking of pissing people off, this season was very *gasp* VIOLENT! :OOOOOOOOOOOO

Also, Michael Grade flat out fucking killed the show after this point... at least, for 18 months. It's because of this that the following season was completely abandoned and replaced by some fat gay guy's "song" a season about courtroom drama.

Serials of Season 22

Episode Title Written By Description
Attack of the Cybermen Paula Moore The Doctor and Peri get caught up in a Cyberberman plan to destroy Earth with Halley's comet before Earth ends up destroying Mondas. Also, that guy from Resurrection of the Daleks is helping a couple guys who have no relevance to the plot in their pointless failed attempt at escaping Telos.
Vengeance on Varos Philip Martin The TARDIS decides that she can't be arsed today and stops TARDISing, so the Doctor and Peri have got to sneak into the Big Brother studio to do battle with Davina McCall's living turd before he subjects them to be in more bullshit reality TV (the Doctor would've committed suicide if he were shoved into that Kim Kardashian show).
The Mark of the Rani Pip and Jane Baker Everyone's favourite meme the Rani makes her debut and has teamed up with the Mattress to do experimental shit with brain chemicals of 19th century peasants and turn the Doctor into a tree. GOAT plan.
The Two Doctors Robert Holmes The Sontarans and some hungry ginger fuckface have captured the Second Doctor and held him hostage in Spain of all places to fiddle his diddle, leaving Jamie to team up with Sexy Sixie and Sexy Peri to rescue him before he goes on a drunken rampage over how 100% of his era didn't exist at the time.
Timelash Glen McCoy Ah, I'll explain this one day. Neat script.
Revelation of the Daleks Eric Saward Coming to attend a funeral of a dear friend, the Doctor gets crushed by a Styrofoam statue of himself while the actual plot about Davros taking over a funeral home to make a new race of Daleks takes place.


Regardless of what the fandom says about it, this season is abso-fucking-lutely GOAT, canon and approved by me. People only didn't like it because "WAAAAAAHHHH, THE DOKTAH'S A MEANIE AND THERE'S TOO MUCH VIOLENCE, AND THE EPISODE FORMAT CHAAAAAANGED! MICHAEL GRADE WAS RIGHT, THIS SHOW DESERVED TO DIE!". Btw if you think that, fuck you, this season is the best since Season 18.

Attack of the Cybermen is a decent, if highly continuity-heavy adventure that doesn't get as much love as it deserves. Some aspects of it do feel unnecessary, like Lytton and those two unrelated dudes on Telos trying to steal a spaceship, but the plot itself is pretty engaging, the Cybermen look gr8 m8, Peri's tits jiggle and Colin gets to blast some Cyberass. The music is actually half decent too, though it's also half audio water torture. 7/10

Vengeance on Varos is a great representation of reality TV and how it's absolutely shit. Sil is an excellent looking villain, dem illusion scenarios be creepy af, the torture sequences are pretty realistic, and Colin gets to shove some mothafuckers into a bathtub of sulphuric acid so that they can be melted down into topping for his pies. Also Peri gets turned into a bird... hot? 8/10

The Mark of the Rani is just... pure fun. This one doesn't get nearly as much love as it deserves. The Master dresses up as a scarecrow to spy on the Doctor. Why? Because he can. The Rani decides she's gonna plant bombs that turn people into trees. Why? Again, because she can. The cliff-hangers' gonna involve Colin rolling to his doom strapped to a trolley. You got a fucking problem with all that? C'mon, let a camp story through once in a while guys, you humourless bastards. 9/10

The Two Doctors is a great story with decent intentions; Patty Tratty barely has any surviving episodes left, and he's gonna die in 2 years, and he actually loves doing this show, so yeah sure give him some more stories. Unfortunately he's barely in it, and when he is he's either sedated or has bushy ginger eyebrows. On the plus side, Jamie gets a lot of action, and the Spanish location filming and music are HNNGGG. Also those two cliff-hangers are so rapey-looking that it's actually funny. 7/10

...Hmm, what? Timelash? Ah, I'll review that one some day. It'll be a neat analysis. 1/10

Revelation of the Daleks gets praise from all ends of the fandom for Terry Molloy and its world building and its morbid subject matter, when in actual fact it's pretty shit. The Doctor has literally no presence in this story. At least in something like Blink he's still technically manipulating the events behind the scenes, but this story would literally have happened pretty much the same way regardless of whether or not the Doctor turned up. Sure there are still decent moments, but overall the whole enterprise is just a bore. 3/10

Overall this season is actually pretty decent. Why all the h8 m8? This series is gr8, no deb8. 7/10

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