Peter Capaldi

(Redirected from Peter Capaldick)
Peter Capaldiddle
Capaldi aging backwards.
Capaldi aging backwards.
Actor information
Main role Twelfth Doctor
Other roles Some Pompeii guy
Born 14 April 1958
Status Alive, filling Jenna with his Anaconda
Checking out Santa's sack.
Regeneration's a helluva drug.
Capaldini saving the day.
Calamari after finding out that Danny Splink was hit by a car.
Capaldi Moffat.png


Pacaldi writes his own episode.
Capaldi negotiates contract terms with Steven Moffat
Doctor and Misses Capaldi, with their autistic daughter.
The Doctor we don't deserve.
Capaldi gets the part.

Pietro Capaldini was a well-endowed Scottish actor also known as Reddit, The Capaldick, Capaldoomed and Campaldi.


Pacaldi formerly played the Twelfth Batman in the hit TV series Literally Who? and is notable for playing the only canon Doctor (see the Official Canon Guide for more details).


Stupid Sexy Capaldi left at the end of Series 10, because the show wasn't be as much fun without Moffat to kick around. This means that CapaldiForSeries11 failed. Also he said he will never come back Because he died.

Why Live? But wait, put down the gun, because Capaldi will be returning at an unspecified date in the future to portray the Nineteenth Doctor.


Pierre Coppola was born sometime during the 1960's BC. As a child Pietro was constantly trying to appoint himself dictator of various Doctor Who fanclubs. Billions of lives were lost as the young Capaldini waged war on Doctor Who Fandom. He later started a band called The Dreamboys with Craig Ferguson, Russell The Davies and Matt Smith, but after he was raped by RTD he left the band and became a professional underwear model (only to be raped even harder by RTD.)

Pietro was the cause of Jon Pertweenie's untimely death when he chained Pertwurst up in his basement and forced him to watch the Doctor Who TV Movie.

The Fires of Pompeii

Soon after he appeared on the program itself as a marble worker of Pompeii. Tennant, sensing the fact that he was dealing with a ferociously superior actor, actually attempted to let Capaldi die during the course of filming in order to prevent the Capaldick from stealing his career. Catty Tate stopped him from this cruel act, and the events were written into the episode in order to show there were no "hard feelings".


Pietro has starred in GOAT political satire such as The Thick of It and In the Loop. His greatest role of all was Lair of the White Worm.


When Le Fezzler had his big break doing coke in the dumpster behind Legendary Pictures, Steven Moffat started looking for a replacement Doctor. After many an hour searching he found The Capaldick hiding in a trashcan in Cardiff taking nude pictures of Jenna Coleman. Peter was put on payroll to fuck Jenna 10 times a day and eventually got the role of The Doctor in the hit FOX TV movie Doctor Who.

Series 8 aka Clala Who

Panhandle Capewinkler's first full episode as The Doctor aired sometime during early August on thanks to a caped man named Marcelo Camargo splinking his way onto the BBC servers.

Camargo was immediately hunted by the Moffat Intelligence Agency (MIA) until he was located and chained up inside a shipping crate headed for Cardiff. He has not been seen since.

Leak /who/

Deep Breath, Into the Dalek, Robot of Sherwood, Listen & Time Heist

These stories comprised Pineapple Cappuccino's black and white debut as the Doctor. Released only hours days apart, all five episodes were pretty good. The CGI was miles ahead of anything from the RTD era, and Marigold did his best ever work.

Series 9

Capaldi did not age gracefully between seasons. He's looking a bit pale.

Looked younger and happier than ever.

Series 10

On the verge of death. Moffat has sucked all of the life force out of him. Goodnight sweet prince.

Literally looks younger than Smith.


Since taking on the role of the Twelfth Doctor, Capaldi has invented the strange phenomenon of aging backwards.

See also: